Sleepless in The 'Burgh, or close to it

Be careful what you wish for.

I asked the Sandman to help me escape from the pain of brain exploding migraines by putting me to sleep. Sleep I did, whilst he heartily laughed at my request.

"'Sleep', you said, not rest."

Dealing with the pain of a thousand daggers piercing the 3 lbs of wiggling gray matter in my skull was enough to drive me to self drilling a hole in my head. Not a pain free moment from Saturday to Tuesday, and just when I thought I was in the clear, the daggers came again. Never have I been brutalized in such a way. A migraine here or there, maybe two, but several days worth?

To top it off, I dreamt odd dreams. Eat your heart out Kurosawa! They almost seemed "Dreamscape" like. I felt at times that I was in control of the dreams and at others that someone else was pulling the strings -- a battle of wills -- so to speak. These dreams didn't even feel like dreams, I felt like I was actually living them, somehow. The people in them, genuinely surprised to see me there or expecting my arrival. I did nothing but talk to them. I knew who these people were, a couple of them didn't know me, but it was as if we all knew each other quite well. Seemed everyone was content on laying in bed to talk. Completely plutonic, it was just talk afterall, but laying on their beds -- whether it be their own or a bed used whilst traveling -- seemed to be the thing to do.

Every dream the same, since Saturday, them laying in bed, I, next to them, talking. I would try to move the conversation elsewhere, which would work for a while but the bed always ended up being the main area of conversation. They would fall asleep as -- toward the end -- it would turn into a particularly emotional conversation and I would watch them for a time, wiping tear drenched faces and brushing damp hair out of their face, savoring the peaceful, slow, monotony of their breathing as they slept. But I took on the pain, anguish and insecurities, from those who openly admitted to feeling it and from those who tried hard to hide it deep within. I'd leave them at the crack of dawn, knowing that when the sun came up, it would be a bright new day for them. I would smile, knowing the raw, emotional wounds would scar over and become a distant memory. In reality, I don't particularly like seeing people so vulnerable, it breaks my heart. I'm always at a loss for words and never say the "right thing". I most often commiserate, which I did a lot of in these dreams. Seemed like what they wanted, was someone to just vent to, knowing I'd keep it in complete confidence.

One in particular really got me thinking. I dreamt of him on June 1st. I'd never seen his house, much less his bedroom, before and when I did -- today -- I was a little more than shocked. It was the same room and bed I had seen in my dream. I don't know what to make of it. I haven't brought it up to him, just seems extraordinarily weird and I feel weird enough!

The point I'm trying to get here is that after waking up, I felt like I hadn't slept at all! Like it all happened in the blink of an eye. I woke up achey, stressed, exhausted and could feel the trickle of pain edging into my skull to signal another migraine on the attack.

Only one migraine today and I slept it off. Sort of...