I'm staring at the screen, feeling as if something must be done. Something....
My room is dark, lit only by the illumination of my computer monitor. A hint of music emanating from the speakers. I should turn it up. But as it stands, I'm being disturbed more than I'd like. A certain older female figure in this house has interrupted my thoughts all evening with her excessive inquiries into matters that are of no concern to her. Turning up the music would only pique her curiosity further. To make matters worse, she ignores my perspicuous growls. I need a lock for my door.
I'm brooding. About what? I haven't a clue. I want to brood. I feel like it's the right thing to do. I haven't eaten all day. I don't feel like eating. Maybe that's why I'm in the mood I'm in. I feel like someone close to me has died. There's a sense of foreboding, as if I'm going to hear some distressing news at any moment.
I've been restless all day. I went for a drive. It didn't do much good. I went for a walk. This also did nothing for me. I sat and wrote down nine pages worth of one my fondest memories. This did nothing but intensify my agitated state. So I deleted the entire thing, disgusted.
Can we talk about pain? Seems I have pain everywhere now. It's like I'm in a constant state of having the flu. I don't know what's going on. Seems each week something new hurts and doesn't stop hurting.
I don't know. I wish I were tired, then I could end this day. I think I'll go stare at the stars for a few moments. Try to clear my head.
